I thought my first blog post of 2025 would be a round-up of 2024 and my goals for the year ahead. Hell, the post was almost drafted but I opted not to write it. The urge to try and quantify my work wasn’t there, and it’s largely thanks to the fact I published my first book, Shattered Lines, in October.

Publishing gave me tangible proof of my hard work. And let me tell you, writing anything whether it’s micro fiction, a novella, or a 1,000 page epic, the work *is* hard, but it isn’t always tangible and quantifying what I accomplished each year seemed to help remind me I hadn’t wasted time.

The hours spent with ideas percolating until they’re more than vibes is work.

The hours spent actually committing words to page to convey the vibe I’ve spent time honing is work.

The hours spent rewriting, revising, editing, adding in or removing scenes and chapters is work.

The hours spent simply reading what I have written is work.

Five years of my life was spent with Shattered Lines and despite being a novella, it was - yep, you guessed it! - a lot of work.

Did I love every minute of the process? No. No one loves every minute of anything they do, so that’s okay. But I do love writing. I even love editing.

I have never felt more content in my life than when it hit me that this is now my reality; I write and publish books. And it was that contentment that brought about the realisation that my only goal for 2025, and the foreseeable future, was to keep going.

That’s it.

But a lot has changed between publishing and now. Namely, the politics in the USA and around the world.

Ah, this is what she meant by ‘here we go again’

The last time Trump was elected eight years ago, I was pregnant.

Surprise, surprise I’m also pregnant this time.

The last time, I was filled with dread and a sense of powerlessness.

This time, I’m determined more than ever to move through those emotions, and to work with communities with whom my values, ethics, and morals align. Most, if not all, of what I will accomplish will be done through pure spite and anger, and an understanding that no one can fix every problem, no one can fix anything alone and, most importantly, it’s okay to rest or take a break to prevent burn out.

Four years isn’t a sprint. It’s a marathon relay with a lot of people we can pass the baton to when needed. And that’s remaining optimistic that this fevered nightmare actually ends in four years.

Let’s not forget Trump said this election would be the last one the American people would have, and I have zero doubts he will try to remove the 22nd Amendment.

But even if that happens, I will spend my time uplifting the voices of other marginalised authors because even though I’m queer, white, a female presenting person, and have chronic health issues, I still have privileges others don’t. And I will continue to write and explore themes on how much humans suck, mental health, and social injustices.

Wait, aren’t you published on Amazon?! Isn’t that hypocritical?

Unfortunately, I am published on the ‘Zon. I would desperately LOVE to leave the ‘Zon, but ISBNs in the UK cost money. Each single ISBN is £93, which is a lot. Bulk buy does lessen the amount spent per ISBN, but if I can’t afford £93 for one, I certainly can’t afford the other options.

However, it is a long-term goal of mine to be able to buy a block of 100 or 1,000 ISBNs, and to move away from the ‘Zon and go wide. As far wide as I possibly can.

Undoubtedly there are some authors in the same situation as me. Perhaps we should come together as a collective, see if we can raise some money to block buy ISBNs, and move forward together?

All I know is that it’s not always possible to do the things we need to do in a system that’s set up to work exactly how it should. In this case, the system is set up to give more money to those who already have it, and make it a struggle for those who don’t to make a break for independence.

So, in short, it’s complicated. Nothing is perfect and if the ‘Zon is a necessary evil, I see you.

And the same goes for the use of Meta. I will be moving away from these platforms, but it will take time. Because once again, this is a marathon not a sprint.